bailey

When Bailey Grows Up...

On the drive home today, my ten-year-old stepson Bailey told me what he is going to have when he grows up:

  • 20-30 billion dollars
  • A really big house, with a fence and guard dogs
  • Two Ferraris, and a Corvette
  • Hundreds of kittens. (He'll have to hire people to take care of the kittens, because he'll be too busy with guard-dog training.)
  • An aquarium with rare fish
  • Security dudes
  • Snipers hidden in the dark
  • Motion detectors that will deliver an electric shock to anyone who tries to hurt any of the security dudes
  • A special button, carried in his back pocket, that will instantly drop an anvil on any attackers. The anvil won't hurt them too much; it will just knock them through the floor into a jail cell.
  • A locked room containing gold bricks. The only people with keys to this room will be Bailey, his best friend, and the security dudes. The security dudes get paid twenty dollars per week, and two gold bricks per month.

Sounds like a plan. I hope he'll let my wife and me stay somewhere on the grounds, preferably in a rent-free beach house like Thomas Magnum.

He also asked me if he could get rich by making toothpaste. I wish him luck.

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